DAVID: I just bought this book. It's got all this stuff about how to purify water and skin animals.
SCOTT: So you're ready for the apocalypse.
DAVID: Big time. Cause when it hits, everybody's going to be in the woods. And I'll know what to do.
SCOTT: That's right. That's a human being's first instinct: world ends, head for the forest.
DAVID: Damn right!
SCOTT: Only you'll already be there. "Where are all the squirrels to eat?" they'll say. "Who has eaten all the squirrels!"
DAVID: Yes! But then, when they're looking for the squirrels, I'll be back in their houses.
DAVID: Because the first instinct in case of apocalypse is to head for the woods, not to head for home.
SCOTT: So they'll be in the woods, and you'll be helping yourself to their canned soup in their pantries.
SCOTT: Soup is better than squirrels in my opinion. There are no bones to pick out.
SCOTT: Except for Campbell's Bone Soup. But the bones are kind of the point when it comes to that one.
DAVID: They've had trouble selling that one.
SCOTT: I know. The commercials are ridiculous. "Bone Soup! It's Mmm, Mmm... *hack* *hack*..."
DAVID: *hack* *gag*...
DAVID: *hack! hack!*...
SCOTT: *hack... gulp* ... Good.